Sunday, September 23, 2012

Today



Dear baby,
We have been thinking about you a lot this summer, filling out home study paperwork and talking to Finn about you every day.

We ask him all the time if he wants a brother or a sister and everyday he changes his mind.
Sometimes he wants a sister so he can be Charlie and she can be Lola, but when he's playing with his guns or cars he'll say he wants a "brudder". I don't think he understands quite yet that a sister can rough and tumble as much as any boy and a brother could be Charlie and Finley. I told him that the other day and he beamed. Really, I know he will love you no matter what you are. He's just ready to be a big brother.

And you little one, are you ready to have a big brother? Are you ready to be cuddled and kissed and loved so much you just might explode? Because I'm pretty sure that's what all three of us here at home have planned for you. There's not going to be much tummy time for you with all the snuggles we have stored up.

Today we filled out our application with CAC, our consultant group and we left it open. Boy or girl, 0-1. We decided long ago we don't want to try and play God. We know the perfect baby for our family, sweet little you, is already out there waiting for us too. And we can't wait to meet you. 

I must admit, I do wonder almost daily if you are born yet or in your birth mama's belly still. I wonder how your feet will look. Will they be fat and round or long and skinny? Will you be tall like your brother? Will you have dimples and big squishy cheeks? Will you be tiny and newborn when we get you or will you be a tiny little teether with a row of bottom teeth?

I dream of you now, just like I did your brother Finley and I hope you know you are loved without a shadow of a doubt. Because you are.

I love you to the moon and back little bunny.

Hugs and kisses.

Your mama